We are so screwed up

Here's something pretty good from today's emails. Sorry for the crappy formatting, but I don't have time to deal with it right now.

Have I got this right?

IF YOU CROSS THE NORTH KOREAN BORDER
ILLEGALLY YOU GET TWELVE YEARS
HARD LABOR.

IF YOU CROSS
THE IRANIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU ARE DETAINED INDEFINITELY.

IF YOU
CROSS THE AFGHAN BORDER ILLEGALLY, YOU GET SHOT.

IF YOU CROSS THE
SAUDI ARABIAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE JAILED.

IF YOU CROSS
THE CHINESE BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU MAY NEVER BE HEARD FROM
AGAIN.

IF YOU CROSS THE VENEZUELAN BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE BRANDED A
SPY AND
YOUR FATE WILL BE SEALED.

IF YOU CROSS THE CUBAN
BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU WILL BE THROWN INTO POLITICAL
PRISON TO ROT.

IF YOU CROSS THE U.S. BORDER ILLEGALLY YOU GET:
1 - A JOB,
2 - A DRIVERS LICENSE,
3 - SOCIAL SECURITY CARD,
4 - WELFARE,
5 - FOOD STAMPS,
6 - CREDIT CARDS
7 - SUBSIDIZED RENT OR A LOAN TO
BUY A HOUSE,
8 - FREE EDUCATION,
9 - FREE HEALTH CARE,
10 - A LOBBYIST IN WASHINGTON
11 - BILLIONS OF DOLLARS WORTH OF PUBLIC DOCUMENTS
PRINTED IN YOUR LANGUAGE
12 - AND THE RIGHT TO CARRY YOUR COUNTRY'S FLAG
WHILE YOU PROTEST THAT YOU
DON'T GET ENOUGH RESPECT.

I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE I HAD A FIRM GRASP ON THE SITUATION.